Thursday, December 4, 2014

Picking up the pieces

After what happened yesterday, I’m surprised to find myself sitting at my computer typing a blog entry.
My blog, yes my terrible blog. The one that is the center of attention for one lonely audience.
I don’t get it. I always believed that the truth will set you free and that if you do something for the right reason, only good will prevail.
I really don’t know what I believe anymore. I really don’t know what to think about this world and the people living in it.
I guess so many people have turned apathetic because of the bad apples. You know, the people who ruin it for the rest of us.
The people who really don’t care about anyone but themselves. The people who would rather get their way than listen to reason.
I keep trying to wrap my brain around why anyone would ignore the truth. 
Someone once told me, “You can’t hide from God.”
The statement resonates in my mind a lot these days. It doesn't matter what you say or how you try to take the spotlight off yourself by pointing fingers and putting the blame on everyone else, because in the end, you can’t hide from God.
I’m glad to know that no matter what happens or how twisted things get, in the end, I won’t have to hide from God or anyone else. I won’t have to explain why I made the choices I made, because I made them for the right reason and I made them in an attempt to protect the innocent people in my life who depend on me to protect them.
I do need someone out there to help and listen and hopefully that person will come into my life and help.  But at this point, I’m not going to hold my breath.
I guess in the end, I can just take comfort in the fact that when my time comes, I won’t want to hide. I can hold my head high knowing that I have done my best and made the best decisions based on trying to do what is right.
I still believe the truth will set you free even if lying gets people what they want. All I can do is be honest. I don’t know how not to be honest.
I’m hurt today and my heart is very heavy, but I have to believe that the truth will be seen and heard, and more importantly, the right person will step in and get us off the constant loop of ups and downs.

All I want is peace and peace for my family and the ability to protect them.